Sunday, January 16, 2011

Remembering... You

Six of Cups from Legacy of the Divine Tarot, by Ciro Marchetti
I never quite dare to believe, when she told me that what you had for me was true, genuine love. It was something which you had denied to me so defiantly, blatantly and outrightly at the last confrontation of our feelings. And your denial hurt me so deeply that I felt an ultimate despair to let you go.

Perhaps, your intention was the very way I had reacted: To hate you, give up and then, let you go. But I could never quite hate you, because in the core of my heart, it was even more difficult to believe that you care nothing for me. We had taken each other as soulmates in our best times together. With such a feeling of deep and natural connection, your deliberate and forceful denial must have struck your heart just as brutally and deeply, and left you just as crippled as I was.

They say, time heal all wounds, abeit with scars. For all the time I have learnt to let you go, I come to believe that all that you have done was for the love of me. That was in fact, the best way to let you go. You had asked me wistfully on the night we parted, "Do you know, sacrificing your happiness for the happiness of the one you love, is by far, the truest type of love?" I sat in silent grief beside you, thinkng you wanted me to be the sacrified one. Only to realise much, much later, that you had already sacrified your love for the sake of my happiness - knowing you could no longer give either to me, even though you had said, you wished you could...

I still feel the love for you. But they were in the the last ashen remains. And I shall keep them in an urn, buried in the depth of my heart. From now on. 

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I drew a card from the deck of tarot cards she laid in front of me. It was you I had in mind, and the intent attracted a card on nostalgia. The feelings we had for each other had been good memories, and we shall leave them as so.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Dream Man

















溫昇豪 (James Wen), Taiwan Artist


He encompasses the idea of my 'Dream Man';
Not just because of his eye-candy physique,
But because he appeared at a time when I was asking myself,
"How could I possibly find another man attractive again...?"

He is like the transcient fireworks that uses the night sky as the canvas;
Whose fuse offers a glimpse of some locked-up energy within a matter;

A spark that reignites an once shattered, ashened heart;
And inspires the familiar child-like ecstatic feel,
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Of being in love again.  
♥_♥!!