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| Sun Salutations: Giving thanks for a new day filled with life-giving light and sustenance |
My spirit had soared to an awe-inspiring state of enlightenment that came with the highs of insights gained for my life and yoga practice over the past seven days from doing the sun salutations. But like on a roller-coaster ride, I was plunged to a rock bottom state of emotional lows that followed when the seven-day challenge came to the end.
What happen? I could give a few hard reasons, like I was strained out by fatigue - physically, mentally and emotionally - from the going-ons at work; lack of sleep (no, I'm not blaming that fact that I have to wake up earlier than usual for the sun salutations but the admittance that I need to adjust my sleeping hours), and the most eminent culprit: the fear of looking at "What's next?"
From the first day of the Challenge, I had told myself that the reason for doing it is not simply because "Shirly asks me to" - even when it had been the most obvious reason. But I have taken up the Challenge, because in the depth of the heart, I know doing the Challenge is just a prelude to the action steps for the goals I have set for myself. Just as the sun salulations series is a warm-up exercise to the subsequent poses that follow in the Ashtanga Yoga series, doing the Sun Salutation Challenge is the initiator to lighting up the flame of desires that have been (slow-)burning inside me, the wake-up call to the dreams that are awakening up from their deep slumbers...
And most importantly, it is to honour myself - my truth, my goals and my dreams. To really think about what do I want from this point in life going forward - just as what Shirly had told me later, to get to the root of my deepest desires.
I could have easily chose to go back to sleep when I have completed the Sun Salutation Challenge - literally in real life by going back to my sleep routine of waking up to have just enough time to dress up and get ready for work; and metaphorically by going back to sleep on my dreams. But do I really want to do that? A small voice whispered that I probably would not be able to sleep with a peaceful mind even if I want to do so - when the results of a recent blood test revealed that even my body is protesting for a change in the way I have been treating it. And neither am I able to ignore my soul's call for a change, when it has been weeping its deepest anguish and suffering when I am made to confront it these days...
After taking a break on the eighth day since I have started the challenge, I rolled out my mat on the ninth day in its wee morning hours and started on doing the sun salutations. Tired and sleepy as I was feeling, I found my mind clearing up as I finished up the last set of the sun salutation. And as I watched the new day lighting up with the rise of the morning sun, the answer to my question of "What's next?" also dawned on me: Just carry on. With the asanas sequence that follow after the sun salutations. Even if it means I have to wake up another 30 minutes earlier that I am already doing for the sun salutations.
Wake up, and breathe. Breathe, and live for those dreams that the Universe has in Its cosmic conspiracy; for those dreams that the Universe is still waiting for me to show up, and has yet to given up on me.
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When I announced on my Facebook page that I would be doing the Sun Salutation Challenge for the next seven days, some friends had come forward to express and rally their support for me. Though I had not been expecting it for doing a small feat (or so, I thought), I was touched and it had come especially meaningful for they are the very same people who have brought much love and inspiration over the past few years in my spiritual practice and growth.
One of them whom I like to make a special mention is Wendy, a fellow yoga practitioner from my Saturday yoga classes. Not only has she been been following my seven-day Challenge with her quiet and steady moral support, Wendy has gone the extra mile by stepping forward to be my yoga buddy, to be my distant companion and encouragement when doing the full practice that comes after the sun salutations during those dark, early mornings.
She said, "I will be the candle in your life. I am behind you. Even though we are practising at a different venue and at a different timing (Wendy wakes up MUCH earlier than me for her morning practice!), we know we are each other's support and we light up for each other."
Wendy's words reminded me of a story in "Aleph", a book by Paulo Coelho. The extract as follows:
“A man called Ali is in need of money and asks his boss to help him. His boss sets him a challenge: if he can spend all night at the top of a mountain, he will receive a great reward; if he fails, he will have to work for free. When he left the shop, Ali noticed that an icy wind was blowing. He felt afraid and decided to ask his best friend, Aydi, if he thought he was mad to accept the wager.
After considering the matter for a moment Aydi answered, "Don't worry, I'll help you. Tomorrow night, when you're sitting on top of the mountain, look straight ahead. I'll be on top of the mountain opposite, where I'll keep a fire burning all night for you. Look at the fire and think of our friendship, and that will keep you warm. You'll make it through the night, and afterwards, I'll ask you for something in return."
Ali won the wager, got the money, and went to his friend's house. "You said you wanted some sort of payment in return."
Aydi said, "Yes, but it isn't money. Promise that if ever a cold wind blows through my life, you will light the fire of friendship for me.”
And I am so grateful for the fire of friendship from Wendy, as well as those who have lit and guided my path, with the light they shine.
- J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
